And another one gone....Another One Bites The Dust!

Title above: Another One Bites The Dust 
Song here:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rY0WxgSXdEE&ob=av2n  


Mood: Tired
Music: Internet Radio - Dance


And just like that- it's done. The roommate and I talked about our "situation". He basically said that it's pointless to discuss what happened. He said that whatever he has to tell me will hurt my feelings, he doesn't want to do that. He doesn't think I will learn or ever change and therefore doesn't want to discuss it. He suggested we start a "new page" and forget about what happened. He said things will never go back to how they were in the past but for the sake of our third roommate and for the sake of house guests we should put on a happy face and move forward. I asked him "but if I do something to piss you off again, or what if you do something to piss me off again? Then what?". He replies, "don't worry, I've changed. You won't piss me off". If you ask me, that's pretty much bullshit because everyone gets pissed off at each other, especially people that live together, but listen if that's what makes him happy, then what can I do? I can't force someone to confront issues and not sweep things under the rug. 


That's what's funny. People love to "sweep things" under the rug. But this situation is amusing because he didn't want to make up with me for the sake of our relationship- it was plainly obvious when he said "lets just forget what happened just so we can not make people uncomfortable"; it was so that in other people's eyes it doesn't look like we are having "shalom bayis" (peace in the home) issues. I am assuming this is how he was raised and this is how his family handles things as well. Healthy? Not so much, but to each his own. There are plenty of pretentious families that look perfectly happy but are miserable on the inside. Before my folks got divorced, this is what my mother and father looked like. Perfect little family, a lot of mishigas (craziness) behind closed doors. It's fine, whatever makes people happy. Sometimes they need a little fantasia in their lives to satisfy themselves. 


So yes, based on my discussion with him, it is safe to assume the friendship is done. Am I insulted? Eh, a bit but not so much. Why? Because I have gained and lost many friends over the years. I know that people come and go for a reason, the real ones stay and accept you. That's why I am grateful for who I have. 


Another reason why I am not as "torn up" as I would have been (or maybe should be) is because last year, a person that I suspected to be a good friend of mine, randomly stopped talking to me and decided to talk shit about me behind my back for months before and after. Her and I were really "close" for a long time, always hanging out together, always talking, laughing, having good times. So when she decided to stop talking to me, I was crushed. I wracked my brain for months trying to figure out what happened, but then another "close" friend of hers told me she did the same thing to him. I decided that it wasn't me- it was definitely her, therefore, no reason to still be hurt. 


So basically losing her friendship kind of made me immune to people and supposed "friends". Want to be my friend? Great. You don't want to be my friend anymore? Also, great. After all of the bullshit I've seen between people in my life, I've learned that people will turn their back on you in the blink of an eye, and it's fine. Nothing to take personal, its just who they are. Besides, I have like 4000 other more important things to focus on- like learning Hebrew. Damn it, this language is hard. The masters program that I am interested is all in Hebrew, so it's really important to step my game up and master the holy tongue. Eh, I'm getting there. 


Ani medeberet yevrit?